Hey, we had good reason to be a bunch of saps, you brat. It wasn’t stupid.. well, it was stupid.. but, don’t dwell on it.. There’s nothing you can do now. But, yeah, I guess you had your opportunity, huh? Might as well use it while you can.. I promise.. You know me.. I’m not the type to quit.. I’m doing it what I can for everyone.. I promise, you don’t have to worry. You must see all the stupid shit Lexie does to drive me up the wall, then, huh? I know.. they’re so big now.. I can’t.. even remember when they were small. They’ll always be my babies.. but.. jeez. Sadly true with Brooke though. Don’t freak her out too much.. she seems to have more good days than bad now..
I know, but still; you’re a bunch of saps. It was stupid. Part of being dead…you dwell on things. A lot of things….or maybe that’s me. I took every opportunity I got, and it was awesome. I know, but still, you’re going to hit a point where you’ll want to give up. I’m going to worry anyway. That’s all I can do now. Yeah I do, some stuff I encourage her on, other times I sit there and just kind of laugh because she’s so your kid. I do…hell I remember when you were pregnant. She doesn’t seem to get freaked out now…I’ve never really…made myself visible, like now or like when I enjoy freaking the hell out of Justin. I just kind of sit out of the way and watch her…at first she freaked, but now she’s…I don’t know I think she’s used to it.
Okay… So. I bet you’re getting this question a lot but… What’s being dead like?
I actually get that question less often than you’d imagine… It’s…not all that different, from being alive…hell of a lot less pain if I play my cards right. have the ability to keep track on everyone I need to…it’s kind of nice, actually.
Yeah, it was pretty pitiful, huh? I just.. really love you, kiddo. We all did.. It was.. just a big shock, you know? I figured.. you were. That’s so very like you. Yeah.. soon enough, but I gotta do this stupid chemo stuff first, huh? It’s not.. as fun as it sounds. What do I gotta promise? Brooke.. why doesn’t that not surprise me.. But, you, I’m glad.. You deserved to be happy.. you always did. Yeah.. I did. They had a ball, they loved the mini road trip.. And, I had some time off, so it was worth. Said hi to your Mom, too. You really are, though..
Yeah…you bunch of saps. I know…I was stupid…I made a stupid mistake. It’s ironic, really. Well of course…any opportunity I can take to mutter something smart-ass and sarcastic with no chance of you or Jordan smacking me? You bet I’m taking it. Yeah you do. Doesn’t sound fun at all….kind of sounds like hell actually. You gotta promise you’re going to fight until you can’t fight anymore, and you can’t give up. Don’t do it for me, do it for the girls, and I’ll be watching, usually always am…but more so watching the little munchkins than you and Adam…god they grew up. Because it’s my pain in the ass little sister. Nothing she does is surprising. Good…I’m glad. Ah yeah…I have to go see her one of these days. It’s what I’m good at.
Well.. we miss you.. I didn’t want to believe you were dead.. I wanted you to just.. pop up in my office and give me some smart ass response.. like usual. I guess.. It’s coming soon enough, huh? We’ll all get to be up there together… soon enough. How’s Brooke? Is she happy? Are you happy? Are you okay? The girls, they made you Christmas presents.. I left them at your grave.. We never forgot you.
I know that too. I sat there for a while, watching you, and Jordan, and Adam…, watched my mom for a while too. If it helps I muttered some smart ass responses, you just couldn’t hear them. Soon enough, but not yet. So…until soon enough gets here, you gotta promise me something. Brooke is Brooke, not much has changed. I’d say she is… Me? Yeah…yeah I’m happy. That explains those boxes….you went all the way to Connecticut just to leave presents? I kind of am unforgettable…oh god Alyssa had a point, I do sound like a shit when I say that.
Ariana.. I have cancer.. They found it over Christmas break.. They don’t.. know how long.. I thought you were coming to take me.. because I.. died or something. How’s things up there?
I know. I mean…yeah, I can’t deny it….I kind of poke in unseen on you and the kids, and Liv, and Justin sometimes. It’s a habit. You’ll know when you’re dead, Jamie…you’re not stupid like I was. I literally saw Brooke and had to ask her if I was dead. Actually…not that different than before. Brooke’s a little pain in my ass, Alyssa’s a little pain in my ass….it’s kind of like down here only…we’re dead.
.. I’m gonna do that now, just to piss you off..
And you wonder why I call you a little shit.
Okay…now…now I suppose I’m left to roam around for a while.
If you say so, Ariana..
Okay you little shit, go get your closure…earn your wings…whatever it was that you came back and I subsequently follow…I’m going to go roam. If you need me, for the love of god, do not come through a wall and smack me on the back of the head like Brooke likes to do.
Yeah, I do. Okay, fine, whatever.. but please, once I see Bradley, do not follow me.. that’s literally the only time I want at least a little bit of space, you know I hate you seeing me cry.. Oh come on man, Justin’s feeling guilty that he’s had that closure and Liv’s still sitting there, waiting… and what about her kid? That thing you told me to do? Why didn’t you do that?
Hey this is the point I cut the leash and go deal with my own shit. I know I’ve got a habit of peeping in on the private time of others, but I’d at least give you that much decency not to. Hah, jokes on you kid, I’ve seen you cry more than you think. Dude, no. Not going to New York. Not happening. I see her, I’m going to have a breakdown….if dead people can have breakdowns. Because that’s different…you…it’s just different okay?
Yeah I do, Ariana… For his sake..Why did you even follow me here anyway? Aren’t your people in New York?
No, no you really don’t. Because I could? You’re not the only one who has a loose end or two to tie up here. Besides…no New York. Not yet. I took care of Justin. I can’t see Liv yet.
One last reminder; you know you don’t have to do this right?